Little assholes

February 9, 2017dysfunctionaldomesticdiva2013 Leave a comment

Hiiiiiiiiiii! I know, I know, it’s been a while! I didn’t even finish my domestic abuse series yet from you know, ahem, October (insert shame). I promise to get to that riveting conclusion soon! Okay, it’s not riveting, but I’ll share it none the less. I didn’t intend to drop the ball on that but, as you may or may not know, I’m a photographer and thus the fall photo season tied me down with work, work, work. Then it was holiday season and now I’m in a season of “Dear Lord, make it stop!!!!!” I wish I had the time or the words to fill you with something inspirational and send you out into the day with warm and fuzzy vibes but alas, I don’t. Fresh out of warm and fuzzy vibes this morning and it looks like I’m not restocking anytime before bedtime. What I have for you is a pure unadulterated rant. If warm and fuzzy is what you seek, look away now friend. Look away!

Y’all! I wanted kids soooooooo bad. It was like my life’s mission to do motherhood and do it well. You know, not to toot my own horn (toot), but it was something that always came pretty naturally to me. For all intensive purposes, I was a good mom. A refreshing combination of Martha Stewart, June Cleaver, Lorelai Gilmore, and oh I don’t know, Roseanne Conner. The point is, I was rocking motherhood.

Or so I thought…

As of late, I’ve been feeling more like Gemma Teller or Norma Bates (of the series, not the movie). A hot freaking mess. This week has been particularly rough. I’m looking around my house and wondering… how the hell did that happen? What was the thought processes behind this? I tripped on a shoe coming down the stairs. Just one. I immediately wondered what circumstance would make a child say, “you know, I think I’ll just take this one shoe off right here in the middle of the stairs and keep going for a dramatic Cinderella effect”. When I went into the bathroom and saw a whole roll of charmin strung to and fro like party streamers I tried to analyze the thought process behind “I need to wipe my butt, hmmm… wait! Let’s see how much toilet paper is REALLY on this roll.” When I navigated through a battle zone of lego landmines in the playroom (you know, the ones I painstakingly color coded into fabulous Ikea storage bins a mere 2 weeks ago for 3 hours?), I considered what must have undoubtably been a disturbing conversation between my children and their inner selves. Child: “Let’s play with the legos” Child’s inner demons: “let’s ‘make it rain’ legos instead (I can almost hear their devious laughter now).

So as I’ve almost broken my neck tripping on a shoe on the staircase, re-rolled the toilet paper, and mumbled the F word under my breath with each painful lego jab it occurred to me that these little assholes were really making it hard for me to be the domestic maternal goddess I wanted to be! I’ve been down on myself because I felt like I was failing in the mothering department lately. But maybe I haven’t been failing in the mothering department at all. Maybe they’re failing in the considerate children department. You know what, that’s okay because they’re just kids after all.

The problem is, we as parents, equate our children’s shortcomings with our own failures. Forget the fact that I spend 80% of my day cleaning something, the legos on the floor and the shoes on the staircase stare me down like I’m desperately failing at my job. When they don’t excel on a spelling test or win their soccer game, we immediately blame ourselves. “Maybe she would have made a 100 if I wasn’t working all day and spent more time studying with her.” “Maybe she would have made that goal if we went to the park and kicked the ball around a little more often.” We dwell on that one chick-fil-a meal we fed them instead of the 5 homemade meals we served. Why do we put so much pressure on ourselves??!?! We need to stop magnifying our failures and start celebrating our successes… So today, that’s what I’m doing. I’m celebrating the fact that I have 3 beautiful, intelligent, Jesus loving, healthy children and I’m going to completely ignore the lego landmines for another day. In this moment I’m going to sit here with yesterday’s hair and makeup and drink a mimosa. Because contrary to what I often feel like, I do NOT suck at life! Cheers! ❤

What if I don’t want to be a proverbs 31 wife today?!?!

October 13, 2016October 13, 2016dysfunctionaldomesticdiva2013 Leave a comment

Proverbs 31:10-31 (NIV)

Epilogue: The Wife of Noble Character

10 A wife of noble character who can find?

    She is worth far more than rubies.

11 Her husband has full confidence in her

    and lacks nothing of value.

12 She brings him good, not harm,

    all the days of her life.

13 She selects wool and flax

    and works with eager hands.

14 She is like the merchant ships,

    bringing her food from afar.

15 She gets up while it is still night;

    she provides food for her family

    and portions for her female servants.

16 She considers a field and buys it;

    out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.

17 She sets about her work vigorously;

    her arms are strong for her tasks.

18 She sees that her trading is profitable,

    and her lamp does not go out at night.

19 In her hand she holds the distaff

    and grasps the spindle with her fingers.

20 She opens her arms to the poor

    and extends her hands to the needy.

21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;

    for all of them are clothed in scarlet.

22 She makes coverings for her bed;

    she is clothed in fine linen and purple.

23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,

    where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

24 She makes linen garments and sells them,

    and supplies the merchants with sashes.

25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;

    she can laugh at the days to come.

26 She speaks with wisdom,

    and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

27 She watches over the affairs of her household

    and does not eat the bread of idleness.

28 Her children arise and call her blessed;

    her husband also, and he praises her:

29 “Many women do noble things,

    but you surpass them all.”

30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;

    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

31 Honor her for all that her hands have done,

    and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
Ladies, not a single one of us hoped on board the marriage and mommy train without good intentions.  If we were raised in the church, we probably knew a thing or two about Proverbs 31.  We wanted to be Proverbs 31 wives.  Or I mean, at least I did.  “Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her”, I mean, who wouldn’t want that right?  What I didn’t realize was how exhausting achieving Proverbs 31 wife status truly is!  It’s funny, because the chapter is brutally honest about the work it entails but it flows so beautifully that I pretty much only focused on the end part where my kids and my husband were going to think I was the bomb.com and love me and praise me and all that good stuff all the time!
The thing is, 99.99% of the time I’m the first one awake in the morning and the last one in bed at night.  I don’t always make super terrific decisions because I have TOO MANY decisions to make daily!  Where everyone needs to be and when, immunize my kids, don’t immunize my kids, buy organic, dairy is good, no, it’s really not, what should I put in their lunchbox?  I open my arms to the poor, the wealthy, and everyone in between.  So much so that I have nothing left for myself most days.  I’m literally doing something for someone else daily.  I don’t always speak with wisdom.  Sometimes I speak downright foolish things.  Idle time?  What is that?!?!?  My kids, they don’t always “arise and call me blessed”, my husband rarely “praises me”.  Often my job is a thankless one.  I don’t feel like I’m surpassing anyone or that I’m being honored by a single soul.  That’s all okay, I don’t need recognition or a pat on the back very often.  I do these things proudly and joyfully (most of the time). But somedays, SOME DAYS, I don’t want to be a Proverbs 31 wife, I don’t want to wake up before everyone else or stay up once everyone has gone to sleep because there’s still much to be done.  Sometimes, I want some idle time.  I think I deserve some idle time dangit!
The problem is, we’ve put so much pressure on ourselves to be the Proverbs 31 wife by taking care of everyone else that we completely neglect ourselves.  You’re not going to be perfect, ever.  You can’t do it ALL, everyday.  It’s okay to sit down and prop your feet up sometimes.  It’s totally okay for your husband to toss in a load of laundry or cook a meal occasionally.  It’s okay to go through the drive through because you don’t feel like cooking!  It’s okay to sleep in sometimes.  You may not be the perfect wife and mother that you envisioned you would be, but you rock!  You may not get a lot of public recognition for your efforts from your husband or children but, I assure you, they appreciate all you do for them.  Take some time for you today if you just don’t feel like being a P31 wife.  Go get your nails done ladies, take a load off!  ❤
You can print this little design I created for my nightstand here: proverbs 31 printable

per·fect

May 30, 2016May 30, 2016dysfunctionaldomesticdiva2013 Leave a comment

per·fect

having all the required or desirable elements, qualities, or characteristics; as good as it is possible to be.

Years ago, when my husband and I were in the midst of some marital turmoil, he confided in a friend that one of our biggest problems was that I was too “perfect”. The way he said it was insulting rather than a compliment. When I asked him what exactly that was supposed to mean he said “You’re good at everything and it’s annoying”. There’s something about that statement that has resounded with me since. It wasn’t the first time someone had given me a “compliment” like that. In joking I’ve heard, “you’re the perfect mother”, “you’re the mother I wish I was”, “you’re so good at everything”, “you and Dave are so cute, you’re like the perfect couple”, “you put my project to shame” Funny, these statements were meant to be compliments, but to me, they magnify all that is imperfect about me. I think a lot of us feel this pressure partially from society, primarily from ourselves, to be perfect. I didn’t realize my quest for perfectionism was so annoying but I know I often feel exhausted by it. I recently posted this photo on my personal instagram & fb pages:

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Sure it was all supposed to be fun and games but it rings incredibly true. We slap on a cool filter and display the best of us. We rarely post the “real” us. We talk about and post the good but not the bad and the ugly. Sometimes I’m a rockin’ wife, mom, daughter, sister, and friend but never am I close to perfect. In fact, more times than not, I’m completely drowning here! I know I’m not alone here and I think we should all start being a little more real with one another about it. I don’t want to dwell on my imperfections or shortcomings but I certainly don’t want to portray a “perfect” life. Maybe if we all started being a little more real with each other, we may be able to let go of some of the pressures that plague us daily. This week, I shaved one leg and not the other, was late to church, got into a fight with my husband, yelled at my kids, missed the memo about 1st grade awards and didn’t show up, fed my kids absolute junk food at least 3 out of 7 days, and almost forgot to pick them up from school. Nobody’s lunches were cut into cute shapes, the grocery store was out of organic 2% so I bought regular, and I didn’t work out once. I did however plan a camping themed family night complete with a tent in the playroom, an obstacle course, and driveway s’mores which I posted the crap out of. Betcha didn’t see a single photo of all the things I totally screwed up though did you? My point? I’m not perfect, you’re not perfect, we will never be perfect. The good news is, we don’t have to be perfect, just real and kind to one another. Lighten up y’all, go easy on yourselves, were all in this together!

Holes in my shoes

March 1, 2016dysfunctionaldomesticdiva2013 Leave a comment

This morning, I woke up ready to take on the day! Seriously, things were going off without a hitch and we were on time and life was good. I took the big girls to school and then came home to begin getting A ready. She looked quite cute in her little ruffled leggings and super sweet twirly dress. She even picked a cute chunky necklace and a big pink bow to put in her perfectly placed ponytail. I went to the kitchen to finish making her lunch and told her to put on her shoes and grab her backpack. She came to me in a bit of a panic because she couldn’t find her folder. We looked for a bit and then decided maybe one of her sisters had accidentally grabbed it as they all keep their backpacks in the reading nook side by side. Our folder search ate up any spare time and before I knew it, we were on the verge of running late. I quickly ushered her into the car and we sped off to school. Upon arrival, I struggled to help her grab her nap mat, backpack, lunchbox, Ted, and her quest box (why does a 4 year old need this much gear for MDO?!?!?!). We fought our way up the stairs and into class and her teacher commented on how pretty she looked. I noticed she had a little breakfast left on her face so ushered her to the sink to wash her face before kissing her to tell her goodbye. There my perfectly dressed little princess stood before me smiling as I glanced over her to proudly bask in all her head to toe adorableness. That’s when I noticed it…

There before me were her big toes gleaming out staring me in the face. I could immediately feel my smile contort into an open mouthed gaping state of shock. I froze absolutely horrified and began to panic. You see these old glittery toms had become her “play shoes”. She would slip them on and frolic outside to play for hours. Recently, I had noticed her dragging them along the concrete as she rode her scooter and thus had ripped holes in the toes. I told her to throw them away and that I would get her a new pair. I trusted that she had but they’re her favorite shoes all broken in and comfy like that and so I guess she couldn’t bare to see them go. I began to explain the situation to her teacher and vowed to return shortly with a less beggar looking pair. I drove home in a hurry eager to grab some decent foot ware and return them to my little darling.

As I left the school for the second time after delivering suitable shoes, something hit me. I have holes in my shoes too. Not literally. Metaphorically speaking. My life is imperfect. I often fall short of the mother, the wife, the daughter, sister, friend, and Christaian that I want to be, that I know God wants me to be. I sin and disobey and cling to things in my life that are broken because they are “comfortable”. When God tells me, “throw those things out, they are not good for you, I have something better for you”, I ignore him. I look past those holes because grabbing a hold of something new is scary. Sometimes new shoes leave blisters until they’re broken in you just have to get through that initial pain before they become your new favorite shoes. Sometimes it’s easier to put a patch on the holes in those old shoes than it is to risk the blister of the new ones. But God wants us to have new shoes. He wants us to be the very best that we can be and he wants us to remember that he’s there with us through that blistery transition period. I want to encourage you today to look at the holes in your own shoes. Those broken relationships, that self inflicted criticism, those judgements, those addictions. Lay that worn down pair of shoes at His feet and exchange them for a shiny new pair. Exchange them for healing. Remember, they won’t feel perfect the second you put them on for the first time. They’ll be stiff and may cause blisters and that’s okay. It’s just part of the process.

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. psalm 147:3

Sheriff Callie Party

February 18, 2016February 19, 2016dysfunctionaldomesticdiva2013 Leave a comment

I know I’m a little behind on sharing A’s December birthday party but I figured while I’m on a roll, I may as well back track! She requested a Sheriff Callie party and I’m typically pretty opposed to character parties but I thought I could probably run with a cowgirl theme so I agreed. Of course our first step was to snap some photos for her invitations. I stumbled upon the cutest little flea market outside of town that looked like a mini old west town from the outside so we loaded up and took advantage of the scenery.

I designed a quick and colorful invitation in photoshop and sent it off to my print company. The above photo was the back and the front was this:

We used our trusty ole tablecloth trick to transform our garage into the ole west. We picked a blue color to look like sky and my mother had the idea to use cotton to make clouds. The result was pretty adorable! I knew early on that I wanted to make an old west town out of appliance boxes for the party so I called me local Lowe’s and asked them to save me a few refrigerator and washer/dryer boxes. They called within days saying they had a few and we went to work cutting and painting them. We made a bank, Ella’s saloon, Uncle Bun’s store, and of course the Sheriff’s station and jail. I had my husband cut a walkway between a refrigerator box and a dryer box so that we could connect them. That way when the Sheriff had to throw someone in jail, they had to go through the station door. We used a box cutter to make the bars and tin foil to give them a metallic look.

We took pictures of her stuffed animals and added them to wanted posters in photoshop then printed them in sepia tone and taped them inside the sheriff’s station and the outside door. I used scrapbook paper that looked like old distressed wood from Hobby Lobby for the bank and sheriff’s station doors. We bought fake money at dollar tree for the kids to play with in the bank, plastic cups and pitcher (also from dollar tree) for the saloon, and brought out some play kitchen foods and shopping bags for the general store. It’s amazing how much fun kids can have in cardboard boxes!

As our guests arrived, we got them all fitted in bandanas, cowboy hats, and deputy badges. We got the foam hats in black and brown at dollar tree and the bandanas at Hobby Lobby. Because they were so large and the majority of our guests were under 5, we cut each bandana into 4th’s. This was cost efficient and they fit much better on little ones. The deputy badges came from Hobby Lobby as well. We also gave each guest a little drawstring canvas bag from oriental trading to keep their gold nuggets in from the panning for gold station.

Because our party was in the afternoon, we served sweet snacks rather than an actual meal. We choose flavored popcorns from a local gourmet popcorn shop and put them in little cow print favor bags from Hobby Lobby. We also made s’more pops by putting large marshmallows on a skewer, dipping them in melting chocolates, and then covering in sprinkles. These were a huge hit as were the chocolate coins. I raided our American Girl collection and thought this Our Generation horse stable was the perfect addition to our table. We used it to hang onto our snacks.

I found those awesome fabric garlands on clearance at Michael’s for around $3 each and knew I couldn’t pass them up. We found the tissue fans at Dollar Tree for an extra pop of color.

Kids colored Sheriff Callie sheets and “roasted” their marshmallows over the “fire”. I found that adorable inflatable campfire at oriental trading and it was a big hit! I printed the coloring sheets directly from the disney jr. website.

My niece, nephew, and girls tried out the panning for gold station before the party started. For quality assurance purposes of course. To make this, we purchased a small bag of decorative rocks from Dollar Tree and spray painted them gold. We then took a large long plastic bin and filled it with sand purchased from Home Depot and sprinkled the “golden nuggets” all around burying them in the sand. We added water to the top and added some shovels and other sand toys we already had. We used foil pie tins which we hammered holes into the bottom so the kids could scoop and sift. Whatever nuggets they found, they got to take home in their little pouches. There was a steady flow of children here the whole party. HUGE hit even with the older kids!

Another huge hit was the Photo Booth area. To make this, I just took an image of a wanted poster I found online (I’ll link it if I can find it again) and enlarged it in photoshop. I then printed it off in quarter sections. We cut it out, burned the edges with a lighter to give it an aged look and then glued it to a piece of cardboard that was left over from our cardboard box town renovations. We used a box cutter to cut out the center and thumb tacks to secure the edges and look like fancy nails. We used a long thick piece of leftover cardboard to create a stand and then placed it in a small bucket filled with sand and rocks to steady it. The kids had fun with this but honestly, I think the adults had more fun with it! haha

Unfortunately, in my haste, I forgot to photograph the other 2 activity stations we had but they were inexpensive and simple and kept the kids busy the whole party long. We took a stick horse from our playroom and stuck it in the yard by digging a small hole for the stick. We set out hula hoops we already had and let kids try their hand at “lassoing” the horse. It was sort of like a ring toss on a bigger scale. We also had buckets which I had decorated with pictures of boots I had printed and colored. We purchased plush snakes from the dollar tree and kids had to try and toss the snake in the boot. We called it the “there’s a snake in my boot” game. Because we’re witty like that! 😉

The Sheriff and all her little pals had a great time and those darn boxes stayed in our garage for a month because we couldn’t bring ourselves to toss them! lol

Birthday Carnival Fun

GalleryFebruary 18, 2016February 18, 2016dysfunctionaldomesticdiva2013 Leave a comment

Gosh, I’ve been pretty bad about updating here lately. What can I say? I’ve been a busy beaver for sure! The holiday’s had me swamped and then it was birthday parties and traveling and out of town guests galore! Last weekend, we hosted T’s 7th birthday party here at home. Even though I never managed to get A’s Sheriff Callie party blogged (I better do that today too!), I thought I would go ahead and get the details for the Carnival party blogged while they were still fresh on my mind.

We decided about 3 months ago that we would be going with a Carnival theme and took to pinterest immediately to begin planning. A few weeks before the party, I took her out in some colorful clown garb to snap a few photos for her invitations. They’re pretty goofy but they’re probably my favorite pictures ever of her because they really let her silly personality shine! Here are a few of my favorites!

I normally have really cute double sided photo invitations printed from my print company but, unfortunately, I procrastinated a bit and ran out of time. Instead, I had them printed 2 to a page at my local office depot. They had them printed and cut down to size for me within an hour and they were on their way to the post office that afternoon!

Meanwhile, we begin gathering supplies and prizes for the games and sketching ideas for setup in chalk in the garage and driveway. Haha We decided that since A. I would be returning from camp with my oldest the night before the party and B. The party was in the afternoon that we would not serve a full lunch menu but instead opted for snacks and sweets. While I was at camp, I enlisted my hubby and mama to transform our garage into a big top canopy by using plastic tablecloths. We’ve used this method for many parties and it always works so well. Gives us an ample party space while still being whimsical and colorful. You almost forget you’re in a garage. Thankfully, weather for both my girl’s winter birthdays has been absolutely perfect!

I wish I had taken a better picture of the garage because it looked super cute but you get the gist here. We served popcorn, cotton candy, cake, and ice cream. I got the cute little carnival napkins at Hobby Lobby, as well as the little cotton candy stand, and the marque looking signs. Most of the other table decor came from the dollar spot at Target! We found the colorful popcorn containers there as well as the felt birthday banner and letters, and the cute little red cake stand. Because I didn’t have a lot of extra time or energy for cake decorating, I picked a super simple design and I’m pretty pleased with the way it turned out. I rolled the bottom tier in sprinkles and for the top tier, I designed cute little ticket strips with her name and birthday in photoshop and then took it down to my local Wal Mart bakery for them to print on an edible image. It was quick and easy and the image only cost about $7! I got the little pennant banner, cupcake flags, and glitter 7 at hobby lobby too. I bought bags of cotton candy from our local Golden Corral for $1.25 each and just divided them into small portions and put them on lollipop sticks. They made for a cute display and kids weren’t consuming giant portions of sugar so it was a double win!

We had 5 game stations so each kid was given 5 tickets when they arrived (I got these at dollar tree!) so they each got to try each game once. Because we had extra time and more prizes once each kid had a turn, we allowed them another set of tickets if they wanted to continue playing which most did. We also hired an amazing local face painter. She was a huge hit with the kiddos! Our carnival games were simple and inexpensive as were our prizes. Most were purchased at the dollar tree with the exception of the pet fish soap which I made myself.

The balloon pop station was the biggest hit I think. To assemble it, we used squares of cork board purchased at hobby lobby attached to a piece of plywood we had laying around. We used thumb tacks to attach the balloons and darts with plastic tips for the kids to throw. If they popped a balloon the selected a prize (bubbles or play dough) and if they missed they got a piece of candy. They each got 3 tries per ticket. We got the dart balloons on amazon and the darts 3 to a pk for $1.97 at Wal Mart. We blew all the balloons up prior to the party and placed them in trash bags. We just did a little at a time and within a couple of weeks had them all blown up! 🙂

For the fish bowl game we used small clear plastic cups from walmart filled with water. We dropped a plastic fish toy in several of the cups and kids had to toss ping pong balls into the cups. They got 3 tries per ticket and if they got it in a cup with a fish, they got to take home a pet fishy bath soap. I made these easily by purchasing a large block of clear glycerine soap from Michael’s with a 50% off coupon. It totaled about $10 and I still have a ton left for a future craft! I purchased the vinyl goldfish on Amazon. They were so simple to make and the kids had a blast helping me. We cut the soap into smaller pieces and placed them in a microwave safe bowl. We melted them in the microwave and then poured the liquid into small plastic treat bags sitting in mugs. We then moved the bags to a bowl of ice water where we used a skewer to push fish toys down into the soap as it hardened. If you choose to add scent to your soap, mix it in with the bowl.

For the ring toss, we had the painstaking job of drinking beer to empty those bottles! I gave my husband that job weeks in advance thinking they would be done waaaaay ahead of time but the week before party time, we only had 2 bottles sitting on the counter! Luckily, we attended a Super Bowl party the weekend before and managed to collect enough! lol I spray painted the bottles and caps and found those super cute carnival soda labels at Hobby Lobby. The kids each got 3 rings (which were harder to find than I imagined).

For the lucky ducky game we purchased 50 rubber duckies and this inflatable pool from Amazon and glued washers to the bottom of each duck. We painted about 12 with nail polish first. The kids got 3 tries to pick a duck with a colored washer on the bottom to win a prize. They got a piece of candy if they didn’t pick a winning ducky.

Last but not least we had a bean bag toss. I didn’t get any pictures of this but it was pretty simple. We used a lawn game set we already had from Academy and set it out side by side that way 2 kids could play at once. Each got 3 bean bags.

After a stop at the face painting booth, our guest were ready to have their picture taken in the ring of fire. I had my oldest and a friend make this using a hula hoop we found at the dollar tree and red, yellow, and orange tissue paper. Made for a cute photo prop!

Overall, I think a great time was had by all. Even this ole top hat wearing Ring Master! Thanks to everyone who came to make our girl’s day extra special!

Christmas Categories-a new take on gifting

November 16, 2015dysfunctionaldomesticdiva2013 1 Comment

Each year, I go crazy at Christmas time. It’s my absolute favorite time of year. We have a tree in every room of the house, mounds of wrapping paper, and Christmas music can be heard starting in early November. I love buying gifts for my kids and each year they have over a dozen wrapped items under the tree from us, countless gifts from friends and family, and a large item Santa brings. I’m seriously finding items from last year in my kids bins that have still never even been opened! So this year, I decided I wanted to take a different approach to gifting. I had seen online about some moms doing a 4 gift per kid principle by using the “something you want, something you need, something you can wear, something you can read” concept. I liked this but decided to adapt it a little because A. I can’t commit to buying my kids a “need” for Christmas. If they “need” something, we just buy it when it’s needed. B. 4 didn’t seem like a right number to me but 6 did. Don’t know why. lol So after brainstorming a little with Dave, I came up with these categories for our kids this year:

1. Something to play together
This could be a wii game, a board game, a play set they would all enjoy, etc. For this category, I picked a board game for each of them.

2. Something to create
This is a craft, art item, or activity. My kids love creating things and doing busy work with their hands like their mama. This could be a craft set, art supplies, or activity of some sort. I got P a paint by numbers print of Van Gogh’s Starry night for her room, T got a set of Bunchems, and A is getting a set of bendaroos

3. Something to read
Pretty self explanatory. They each got a boxed set of books they enjoy.

4. Something to wear
I went with cute Pj’s and slippers for this category for when we are roaming the halls of Great Wolf after Christmas. But it could obviously be anything like a cool scarf, a new pair of shoes, a shirt.

5. Something they wish for
Just a small wish list item. P wanted me to re decorate her room for Christmas so she’s getting a new quilt for her bed and some art work for her wall. The other two wanted a puppy surprise.

6. Something made by Mama
This was one of my favorite categories. I wanted them each to have a gift made especially for them by me (with some assistance by Dad in some cases). For T I made a Shopkins display frame with glittery shelves. I’ve of course stocked the shelves with several new shopkins baskets too! You can see how I did it here. For A, I’m painting a picture of the moon over the eiffel tower. She always tells me she loves me all the way to the moon, all the way to Paris, and all the way back home. So I plan on writing that on there too. I’ll certainly post a photo when it’s done. For P I have a HUGE plan to make her a custom dry erase headboard that looks like a giant piece of notebook paper. Then she can doodle on it to her heart’s content. I’ll post a photo and directions of that soon too. I have to find a secret workplace to complete it! lol

This is our first year doing something like this and I really liked having a little check list to go along and it kept me from going insanely overboard. I found some cute little felt shaped tags at Target and assigned a category to each shape. When it’s time to open gifts, we will hand out all the gifts with the same shape out together that way they are all opening their pjs together or their books together. Should be fun!

We asked Grandparents to gift experiences rather than toys as our children are fortunate to already have so much. We suggested a trip to Greatwolf Lodge, gymnastics classes, horseback riding lessons, ballet classes, museum memberships, etc. Making memories is really better than any toy at the store!

Do any of you do something similar for your kids? If so, what are your categories?

A very shopkins Christmas

November 16, 2015dysfunctionaldomesticdiva2013 4 Comments

It’s happened. I tried to fight it for a long time but I’ve finally succumbed to it. The shopkins craze has hit our house. For about a year now, T has asked me for shopkins every time we leave the house. If you don’t know what shopkins are, they are tiny gumball machine prize sized collectibles which unfortunately do not have the gumball machine price tag. They most often come in “blind baskets” so you have no idea what you’re getting. It’s a surprise! All my nieces in the 6-8 year age range love them and thus my 6 (almost 7) year old has jumped on the bandwagon. This year when making Christmas wish lists, that’s all T said she wanted. Seriously. Anywho, if we’re going to do this shopkins thing, we’re going to do it right. She’s my little collector so I knew I wanted to find a way to display her shopkins so that she could easily reach them to play with but see what she has at all times. This year, we’re doing Christmas a little differently and we have gift categories to be checked off. 1 category is “made by mom”. So for T’s gift, I decided I wanted to make a shopkins display. I purused Pinterest for ideas but couldn’t decide then yesterday, while strolling Michael’s, I hatched a design plan! Thought I would share it here in case you’ve got a shopkins crazed collector too!

What you’ll need:

-An acrylic box frame (any size you choose) I went big with a 16×20

-foam core or sturdy cardboard

-box cutter

-wrapping paper

-hot glue gun

You can use your frame as a template and a straight edge to cut your shelves out of foam or cardboard. I wanted 8 shelves on my display and each shelf needs to be doubled up. So total, I cut 16 strips. Leave them a little longer than necessary (about half an inch. You can trim with scissors later.

After cutting them, I grabbed a glue stick and began sticking them together in pairs.

Next, I cut 8 strips of wrapping paper to wrap around each shelf. I had this fabulous glitter paper that worked perfectly because it won’t scratch easily, it was thicker than my others, and it seamlessly matched up when I wrapped it around without being noticeable. You’ll want to use something similar or solid color for best match up. You could even use printed contact paper! I used my glue stick to secure it to each “shelf”.

Next, you’ll need to find a box or a book that will match your desired thickness. I wanted her to be able to store those little baskets and bags on it too so I found a box that was the perfect width in the closet and used that as a guide. I then used hot glue all along the back and sides of the “shelf” to secure it to the frame.

Moving the box up with each shelf kept them perfectly spaced and I used a small level to double check my work.

I plan to cover the outside trim in ribbon that way I can hang it on her wall as well but I haven’t picked that out yet. Next, stick your shelves with shopkins and you’re ready to go!

This week, Michael’s has a 50% off coupon so I used that for the frame which brought it down to about $7.50! They also are now carrying shopkins in the store so we used to coupon again to score a 12pk set half off!
Hope this is helpful Mamas! I know I’m going to have a pretty happy girl come Christmas morning. 😃

Today’s youth group-tomorrow’s adults!

May 28, 2015dysfunctionaldomesticdiva2013 1 Comment

I sit in the same section every Sunday at church. On the far right 1 row behind the teenagers/youth. Some people are annoyed by them but not me, I’m absolutely fascinated by them. Something about sitting behind them encourages me and gives me hope for the future. Why? Because it’s a place where otherwise macho jock teenage boys will hug each other as brothers in Christ. It’s a place where teens will huddle around a friend laying hands on one another in prayer. It’s a place where the popular trendy looking girls embrace the not so fashionable ones as their sisters. Watching teens with arms extended high to the Lord fills my cup. They aren’t ashamed of their faith, they embrace it. They don’t sink into their seats for fear of looking “uncool”, they jump, they shout, they sing, they dance, they praise! These kids aren’t here because their parents dragged them there, these kids are truly on fire for the Lord and it shines! This is encouraging to me because the world has set them up for spiritual failure. Everything on television, in music, movies, and magazines seems to be advertising sin. Satan entices our children with every temptation that is meant to drag them down to the fiery pits of hell with him. He wraps that sin up in a beautiful red ribbon and it’s hard to resist, especially when you aren’t well equipped. My girls and my nieces aren’t teenagers yet but I know that day is right around the corner for us. I’m so blessed to have many amazing teenage girls that I’ve adopted as my nieces over the years. I’ve loved watching them grow into beautiful, amazing, intelligent, caring, compassionate, God-fearing young women. My heart breaks for them when I see them struggling with some of the “normal” teenage girl dramas and heartaches. I try to reach out and encourage them to the best of my ability because it’s MY responsibility as cooky adoptive aunt to pour into their lives. It’s MY responsibility to show them the love that God has for them. There are a million and one people and influences swirling around them daily pulling them in the wrong direction, giving them destructive “advice”, pressuring them to sin so they need just as many influences lifting them up and encouraging them in the word. We are living in a world where kids who don’t know the Lord are committing unspeakable crimes against other teens and themselves. Our high schools are filled with young pregnant girls, STD’s, drugs, suicide, crime, teenagers with no accountability for their actions whatsoever. I want to encourage each and every one of you whether you have teenagers of your own or not to lift our youth up in prayer daily. Pray a hedge of protection over them and their friends. Pray that they will be so filled with the spirit of the Lord that satan can not sway them. Pour into their lives and be a good listener. Drop unexpected encouraging texts and emails. They need to know that the price of sin is death and that Jesus brings life. Remember that today’s teenagers, are the leaders of tomorrow. If we don’t cover these kids in the blood of the lamb and teach them right from wrong, if we don’t nurture and encourage a Christ centered life, we are not only doing them an injustice but we are sabotaging the future of our nation, of our world. Our teenage girls are especially under attack. Society tells them they aren’t pretty enough, skinny enough, popular enough. Society will teach them that they need the love and attention of a boy to make them feel complete. But, we need to teach them that they are the daughter of a King and their heavenly father thinks they are beautiful and perfect and loves them more completely than any high school boy could even fathom. It’s up to us to raise and encourage God fearing women who will go on to raise and encourage another generation of God fearing women. It’s up to us to pour into those teenage boys and show them how to love and respect a woman just as their heavenly father loves the church, his bride. It’s important that we teach them to love others despite their differences. Schools are filled with so many cliques and so much division, we must teach them to close in those gaps and come together as a family of Christ sharing one simple goal. Love God, love others. Rejoice in the truth and not delight in evil. If we all pour into these tweens/teens and show them to follow Christ, help them fall in love with Him and his word, we can change the world. These kids are our future. Invest in your future! ❤ Be the light! ❤

For lack of guidance a nation falls, but victory is won through many advisers.
Proverbs 11:14

Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long.
Psalm 25:5

Motherhood

May 11, 2015May 11, 2015dysfunctionaldomesticdiva2013 Leave a comment

I want to start with a bit of an apology or a disclaimer if you will, I normally proof read my blogs briefly before I post because I know I can often become long winded or stray from the subject but I didn’t do that here. I just wanted to express exactly what I was feeling without any regards to run ons or subject changes! You’ve been warned.

When I held P (now 10) in my arms for the very first time, I knew being a mom was my calling. I mean, I had always known it but it really reiterated it. Yep, this was what I was meant to do. I was absolutely made to be a mother. I closed my eyes and envisioned my future as a glowing, nurturing, patient, maternal goddess. My entire future glowed before me. Soccer games, cheerleading, PTA meetings, family pictures. Yes, life was going to be picturesque, I could feel it. Even through the pain of my c-section and the late night feedings and poop explosions I trucked on towards the prize. The mother-of-year-prize; as though it was a tangible engraved trophy. I attended all her preschool parties with handmade treats and personalized party favors in tow. I scrapbooked every glorious little detail of her life in elaborate hand cut spreads with corner rounded photos. When I learned I was pregnant again, I just knew I would be an even better mother this time around. After all, I had some experience under my belt now, I was practically a pro! But when T came along, I learned I wasn’t as super as I thought. She was a difficult baby. She pretty much hated anyone but me and refused to be bottle fed at all. Pumped milk was not her thing, she wanted it fresh from the source! lol So class parties and other social events sort of took a back seat to little sister. I felt spread so thin I was sure both of my girls were suffering. By the time T was around 2 and I finally felt like I had a foothold on motherhood again, Dave and I begin talking about trying for our third and final baby. We thought since we were “trying” this time, it may take a while but in no time at all we were expecting again. This pregnancy was exciting to me because we were better prepared for it. It was expected, we were excited, the girls were excited, and we were in a better place financially to accommodate a new little blessing than previously. I was older, more experienced, and completely ready to take this on. After all, I had mastered being a mother of two, how much more difficult could a third child be? A was a pretty difficult child right out of the gate. She was colicky and was seriously attached to her mama. She did like Daddy much more than T did as a baby so that helped. Dave was much more helpful this time around too. He changed diapers and would offer to keep her so I could go to the store alone occasionally. But 3 kids into my parenting journey, I don’t exactly feel like a pro. I am NOT president of the PTA like I envisioned, I don’t even attend meetings. I have a hard time keeping their school and sporting events straight so I’m always late or confused in someway. We haven’t had family pictures taken in years. I’m not a glowing maternal goddess. I’m out of shape and stressed and overwhelmed most days. I feel like I’m drowning and failing in so many ways. I spend most of my days questioning every parenting decision I make and reflecting on every poor choice I made in the day: I text while I was at dinner with them, I fed them chick-fil-a because I didn’t feel like cooking, I didn’t bathe them last night because I was beyond ready for them to go to bed, they watched tv for more than an hour today, I lost my patience, I yelled, I skipped a bedtime story, we didn’t wake up in time for church, we didn’t pray together before bed. Did I spend enough time with them? Did I spend TOO much time with them? Did I let them be individuals and develop their own opinions or am I forcing mine on them? Have I scared them for life? Am I crushing their little spirits and forever changing who they are? Will they need therapy as adults? You laugh, but you know you’ve all thought the same thing about your parenting skills. Some days I hide in my closet and cry because I’m so disappointed in myself as a mother. Our pediatrician constantly compliments me on how well behaved, polite, intelligent, and wonderful our girls are. She praises Dave and I for our parenting every time we visit. Recently, Dave and I treated the girls to a nice dinner at Saltgrass steakhouse to celebrate P & T both being selected as students of the month at school when an elderly gentleman sitting at the table behind us came over as they were leaving and shook Dave’s hand. He said he just wanted to stop by and congratulate us on being wonderful parents. He said he and his wife had been watching and they were so blown away by how polite the girls were and how they just sat there sweetly the entire dinner. They were never rambunctious, never threw a fit, and were absolutely beautiful as well. Dave beamed with pride and the girls sweetly smiled and said thank you before waiving goodbye. Stuff like this literally happens to us every time we leave the house but still I don’t feel like a good parent. I still am overwhelmed with feelings of inadequacy and failure. This weekend was a great weekend for our family. Thursday I attended a muffins with Mom breakfast at the older girl’s elementary school and then a few hours later attended a muffins with Mom event at A’s mother’s day out program. I loved watching them very proudly present me little handmade cards and gifts as a Mother’s Day present. Friday morning, I attended another early morning breakfast event at the school because P had been chosen for a character award. Each time I attend an event at the girl’s school I am bombarded by reports of praise from their teachers, administrators, peers, and other parents. I cried as a letter from her teacher explaining why she was chosen was read aloud choked full of wonderful words of praise like “P is selfless, generous, and there is not a student in my classroom who thinks anything but the best of her. On my own bad days, I can think of a student like her and realize why I love to do this job.”. She goes on to say “Her kindness and constant enthusiasm will be something I remember for many years to come.”. Wow! Included in her award papers was a wonderful collage of sweet comments that each of her peers had contributed about her. “P is a problem solver and I have never seen her with a frown”, “You are a sweet, nice, cute, and generous girl and will be my best friend forever”, “You are awesome! You are fast, nice, gold hearted, a good friend, and very good at soccer”, “She is one of the coolest and nicest people I have ever met”. Were amongst some of my favorite things her classmates had to share about her. I am so so proud of this amazing little girl but I can’t take the credit for it. Even with all this praise, I can’t take credit. She’s wonderful all on her own and I still felt like a failure when I fed her fast food for dinner that night. The next morning, our whole family attended a city wide “Character March” at one of the local high schools. Star students from each school in the city were brought on stage and recognized for being students of impeccable character. This year there were about 18 students out of the nearly 500 enrolled students at their school selected to be students of the month and of those 18, my 2 children were BOTH selected! They were the only set of siblings recognized that day. T’s teacher said about her: “She always has a kind word for her friends and encourages others. She usually goes the extra mile to help teachers and students alike.” She added, “She is a great example to her peers daily and her genuine and caring heart makes her a friend to all.” We finished off the morning with food and fun at the stadium and then enjoyed an evening of pizza and playing with friends. At the end of the night when I kept my children up waaaaaay past their bedtimes and then became irritated when A was extremely cranky and whiney I felt like a failure again. My point in all of this was not to brag on my children, (okay, maybe a little bit, but they truly deserve some recognition), it was to say that no matter what the parenting circumstances are, no matter how other people view you as a parent, no matter how well behaved and kind hearted your kids may be, you will always be your own worst critic. It’s something I’ve struggled with since I became a mother and something I will probably always struggle with from time to time. This morning when I was surprised with a beautiful bouquet of flowers, jewelry from one of my favorite stores, donuts, and hand drawn Mother’s Day cards before church, I cried. Reading the sweet words on the card my husband had selected for me and the wonderful note he wrote at the bottom made my heart swell because I realized something for the first time in all of my years as a mom. I realized that I am enough. I’m not perfect, I’m often impatient, I become overwhelmed, sometimes my kids eat fast food, but I’m doing my very best and you know what? That’s a pretty good start. God didn’t intend for us to be perfect mothers. He intended us to lean on him with faithful prayer. He intended for us to go to Him for counsel and guidance and to raise our children to love him. Can I tell you something moms? You are enough for those babies. Someday when they’re grown, they won’t remember that time we were too tired for a bedtime story, they will remember the love we had for them, the discipline they received when they were disobedient, the lessons we teach them, and most importantly how we instilled in them a love for the Lord.

Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

I find so much encouragement in the word knowing that the Father is with me co-parenting and picking up the slack when I can’t go on. I find hope in His promises for me as a mother and although I know I will always fall short in some area as a mother, I know those sweet, beautiful, amazing, precious babies of mine love their imperfect, absent minded, goofy, flawed mommy more than I deserve. They are truly the greatest gift I’ve ever been given. They try my patience and drive my absolutely batty some days but this wonderful amazing motherhood journey has been the greatest ride of my life!

Proverbs 31:28-29 Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her. Many women do noble things but you surpass them all.

Thank you Lord for loving me so completely despite my many flaws. Thank you for trusting me with these 3 amazing little angels. Thank you for giving me a God fearing mother as an example to myself and my children and for the many amazing mothers in my life. I pray for extra strength for my fellow mommies who are struggling with the same feelings of inadequacy and failure today. Less of us and more of you Lord.

Happy Mother’s Day Mamas! ❤

Diary of a Dysfunctional Domestic Diva

Whining, Dining, and Nursery Rhyming

Mommy Matters